don't try to find the answer when there ain't no question here

A week from today, I will be two years out from my gastric sleeve.

I can't wrap my brain around that fact at the moment.

Or the new charming side effect I have developed. I don't even know how to fully describe it, except that it is as if trapped air gets into Roosevelt and it escapes through my mouth, but this is not burping. I sound like I'm going through an exorcism. So odd.

The dogs enjoy this new treat in our lives as much as I am.

Yet, it's just eventually going to become part of my new normal now. Thankfully, it has not happened out in public.

I am overjoyed by the other new development/milestone I have reached--I can drink water again without gagging.

This was something I did not know if it would ever happen. There are plenty of liquids I can not stomach after regurgitating them once. Granted, rum and whiskey are at the top of that list, so there are good reasons why they made it.

Water got on that list the day after my surgery, when I was able to start drinking again. I drank too much, too fast. At that point in my life, you would think I would have known better, as too much, too fast had never gotten me anywhere of merit before.

Until recently that is.

I am someone who does not like to be surprised. I need to have a clear idea of how my day will progress. I need routine. I need things to be relatively predictable/stable.

I can handle the unexpected. I am quite resilient. Yet, I'm happiest when I know how the story ends.

Towards the end of last year, I started to feel a tug towards a path I had never considered.

Foster parenting

Didn't see that one coming.

At this point in my life, nearing age 40, parenting any human was not in my game plan.

I had resigned myself to being the cool/fun aunt and liked it.

But God stepped in

Led me to volunteer with toddlers, of all age groups, at church

After my first few weeks of volunteering, I knew I may not be content to just be the cool/fun aunt, but figured that was where my life choices had led me

But all of these stories/news articles/blogs about foster parenting starting popping up on my radar. I met foster parents. I loved on foster kids.

And a little voice in my head started whispering "you need to do this"

So, after fighting the idea, I am now on my way to becoming a licensed foster parent

And after being told that it could take a while, once I went to the orientation, the wheels started turning fast

Which alarmed me, because I did not expect it to go fast

However, one thing I have learned in the past few years, if things started happening faster than I anticipate, it's not me in control

From the time I applied for the job I have to getting interviewed and hired, it all happened in under 10 days

Library land rarely moves that fast to fill a job

When I started the process of getting approved for surgery, all of the required tests/procedures were done in record time

I was told repeatedly that it was rare for someone to jump through the long list of pre-surgery authorizations so quickly

Anyhow, now when things start to speed out of control, I am reminded that this is not my timing

It is His timing

And I should not second guess it, as it's right

Doesn't mean that it doesn't scare the crap out of me, but if I did not trust in Him, I would not be where I am today. Or who I am.

And where/who I am, a slightly crazed librarian living and loving her life in Charlotte, surrounded by a great community, living a life filled with love and laughter, it's a good place to be.